Are Men (boys) Really From Venus?

After an incredibly spirited conversation in class the other day, I really wanted to take time to reflect on our conversation. If I recall correctly, at a certain point Bryan made the comment that when it comes to writing, "Men are from Venus, and Women are from Mars." As an incredibly open-minded (read: liberal) Psychology major and a new teacher, I have to say that I actually agree with this to an extent.
I believe that by saying that we have to approach boys differently when it comes to writing and language arts, we are saying nothing different than when we say we have to approach ELLs, LD, GT, etc. in language arts. However, I don't think that this necessarily means we have to teach differently. On the other hand, it means that we need to be more mindful of all our students and their needs when we teach.

I really liked hearing Meg's anecdote about her two boys this summer. The closed-minded child who said purple was a girl color, and the more open-minded one who's favorite color was purple. Now, colors have become gender blind since the whole "real men wear pink" stage, that has thankfully stayed (!), in 2004. However, the stigma that this boy held was clearly one that was delivered to him by someone or something. Children don't often pull statements like that out of thin air. The boy handled his potential bully well and de-bunked a stereotype that the boy would have held potentially forever... and by that I mean until his future boy/girlfriend told him he would look cute in purple. Anyway...

As teachers, it's incredibly important that we set a few standards in the classroom. These standards need to be set high from the beginning and need to be non-negociable. Without these standards, I don't believe it would be possible for you to teach with all students in mind. By first creating an environment that is non-judgmental is key. Second, it needs to be said, affirmed, and practiced that when students are sharing personal likes and dislikes, that they are all opinions that can be respectfully and privately accepted or rejected. Third, and most importantly, is to teach that everyone comes from a different background; no two families are exactly the same and we each bring our own experiences to the classroom. We need to be respectful and recognize that there is no one "normal."

From here, we can start teaching to every student in the classroom. Just as we need to carefully accept writing prompts and activities that cater to ELLs and LDs, we need to cater to boys and girls. Since we are all fundamentally the same, I don't think it's appropriate to assume that one type of student would be interested in one thing over the other. I really like that in my practicum classroom, for example, my students have a variety of prompts for free writes. I haven't often seen my students use them, but the list has everything from "write about your family or home country/state" to "write about your favorite thing to do in your free time." I also like that many of the prompts draw on a student's experience like, "write about a time you tried something new." All of these prompts are accessible to all students, open to interpretation, and are non-gendered. To me, if the writing is relavent, it will reach the student. Boys, girls, black, white, ELL or English native, it doesn't matter if you give students broad concepts and writing prompts, or let them write about what they want if it's reasonable. Allowing students choice, no matter who they are, is motivating and can move an unmotivated reader or writer to one who thoroughly enjoys the activity.

Society is pretty obsessed with labeling people and putting them in boxes. I think to say that boys and girls learn differently is fair, but to say that we need to teach to each gender individually is a little extreme. Support always needs to be in place for those who struggle, but we don't need to further put students in boxes by teaching a completely different way.